Painting Stories - Neowise at Vesper Meadow
Neowise at Vesper Meadow, Oil on linen panel, 12” x 16”, Sarah F. Burns
I made this painting in the summer of 2020, but it feels appropriate this image now, during the winter, when nights are long.
As you must already know, and maybe even tire of hearing - Vesper Meadow is a place of refuge and restoration - for humans, for animals, for insects and the land. They have a place for invited guests to camp and do retreats or special projects of many kinds. I asked if I could have my own private artists’ retreat there. I have a series of paintings I create there every year in July and so that seemed like a good time to come. The idea of an artists retreat in nature is very romantic. I imagined myself relaxing, being very focused and productive and not distracted by the mundane or the digital.
The first thing I did when I arrived was to set up my little home for the next few days in the spacious wall tent nestled in a group of trees. That evening I took a walk, made tea, made dinner. As I mentioned, I liked the idea of getting away from technology and being alone in a beautiful place, but the reality was more lonely than I expected. I told myself it just takes getting used to.
That night I listened to an audio book and tried to sleep. It was colder than I realized it would be in July. I wore all my clothes to bed. Despite Vesper Meadow being located deep in the mountains, surrounded by mostly BLM land and very few homes, there was a surprising amount of noise from the cars on the nearby highway. The slope of the meadow acted like an amphitheater, making the infrequent traffic as noisy as if it were right outside the tent. Being so remote, some drivers took the opportunity to spin donuts at the junction 1/2 mile over. Then I heard gunshots. From far away, but still it was really creepy because I was alone. Eventually I fell asleep, only to be startled WIDE awake by a field mouse running through the tent and right over me! Good grief! In this moment I truly regretted this “retreat.” What was so great about being alone, cold, and scared? I think I cried a little. I felt stupid for imagining this situation was going to be restorative. I thought there must be something wrong with me for not being able to relax and properly enjoy nature.
Since I was awake, I went out to pee. I tried not to think about what cougars might be lurking in the dark. I walked away from the tent area, over to the edge of the trees where the meadow starts to open up. I looked to the north and saw — a beautiful comet — just above the horizon. The sky was very dark so the comet really glowed. Amazing, mesmerizing and energizing - HERE was a brilliant reward for all the discomfort! The comet Neowise - a once in a lifetime event. Not visible from my home in the valley, I had heard about it and thought it could be possible to see it from Vesper Meadow, but wasn’t sure what time and where exactly to look. So really getting to see it - what a joy. There is nothing grander than natural wonders.
Standing there I mentally composed a painting. Then I sketched my design by lantern in the tent. I was so excited that I had to go out and look again a couple of times. I wish I could say I was so refreshed by the experience that I slept great too, but in reality I tossed and turned and got up to pee a bunch more times. Sleep came, but, you know, not the greatest.
In the morning I took my easel and set up to draw the design by daylight. My plan was to draw the tree and paint the colors from memory. I would then look again at night and rework the piece the following day, and finish it later in the studio.
My sister and her children came up for an exploration of the meadow during the day, and that night my husband and a friend came up to look at the comet before bedtime. It’s been so long that I can’t remember if I was able to talk my husband into staying the night. I think he had something he had to do in the valley, so he couldn’t. It really doesn’t matter at this point, but I did make it one more night. Humbly I had to recognize that even though I LOVE nature and being outdoors, I need more practice at spending time alone, and that I am excessively attached to technology. But I’ll always remember the thrill of seeing the comet and the satisfaction of making this painting more than paid for the lost sleep!
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